Don't always know what I'm doing...

Yeap... 2012 is here and I'm pretty lost. Yeap... Sounds pretty strange for a person who's always had her life planned out to a T!!! But sometimes I lose direction, I wallow in too many things that I shouldn't be wallowing in, or thinking negatively for too long. It is quite something to have to sometimes take heed from the least likeliest of people to realise what a sorry case I've become just because something didn't pan out.

I've delayed writing my cookbook because I lost inspiration despite cooking and having a dysfunctional camera doesn't help either. I've put on hold plans to do a ton of things because... Well just because. No particular reason at all. I don't know why I do it but I just do.

I reflect back on 2011 and I see a troubled soul even though I've had my achievements. I don't know how to let go. I don't know when to let go. Perhaps when intuition plays such a huge part, I end up being a dushbag... Not entirely wanting to let go. But I need to seriously stop feeling sorry for myself. Pick myself up and just leap ahead in life. To be happy again. To write properly once more. To get ahead in my cooking. To pursue Masterchef perhaps. You never know...

I still don't know what I have in store for myself but with perseverance, strength, hard work, determination and a dosage of happiness, perhaps 2012 will be a good year after all.