Can we ever see past the trials
Can we ever overcome the tribulations
Are we set to live life that others have mapped out
Not knowing whether we'd ever be more than just...
Can we unlearn what we've learnt?
Can we un-experience what we've gone through?
Do we want to be someone else in the meantime?
Just so we don't feel used...
Just so we don't feel hurt...
Just so we don't cry anymore...
But perhaps it is best to go through it...
To feel like life isn't as easy as it seems
To face it with your head screwed on...
maybe not so tight but a little loose ..
...and a bit tilted to the side...
Who knows what may come
In the next second, minute, hour or day
Do we smile, laugh, frown or sob
Do we whine, enjoy, rebel or just plain sulk
I wouldn't know...do you?
We mope about the bad things
As if the world revolves us little beings
When there is more to look forward to
Then just the simple problems we make them out to be
Being at peace with ourselves
is probably more important
than barking at the neighbour...
or the driver who doesn't seem to know what he's doing
Because if we don't love ourselves first
We can never properly love those around us
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life. Show all posts
Friday, 23 September 2011
New phase in life...or not?
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I realise how sometimes I don't really think when I do something. My passion in life always drives my decisions and gets me going. But sometimes it just runs askew and there I am left dumbfounded, shocked, unamused by what has transpired and down right... disgusted perhaps?
I am an emotional person. A person where feelings mean a whole lot more than just well... feelings I guess. The way I see it, I invest in many things emotionally. Some may say that it is good because I take ownership of it, some may say it is dangerous because then I over indulge in it and hence my feelings / emotions get thwarted. I believe in God and Jesus Christ as my guide but my heart tells me and guides me far more than God. A lesson sometimes I think I should learn in which God should be the one to guide rather than me trying to be self-righteous and go on a hell-bender and hope to GOD that things will pan out. But that pretty much describes my life.
Anger is never one of my strong traits and when I do get angry it somehow is tied to a huge catalyst of some sort. And what when anger does come into play, boy oh boy does it get out of hand.
People know me as a calm person with very little anger spurts because I keep it under control. But maybe because I don't like confrontations that are anger based. But when I do get angry at anyone, then the silent treatment is given. But recently I have been more vocal. More in your face.
I don't know what to make of it. Is it because I can no longer keep quiet and that by voicing out my discontent, I'd be able to have some kind of dignity? Or by defending my position, it will at least help in telling people that I am not stupid and that my arguments have basis?
I am at a point in time where being tired is a common occurrence. Tired from what? Tired from being the little nice girl. Tired from being the one who minds her mouth because she doesn't want to piss off the person she is with. Tired from always having to think of what to say to make sure doesn't sound stupid. Or maybe just plain tired. Tired because I have not been able to absorb life to the fullest.
All this I can tell is quite challenging to me. I remember writing in a previous posting on another blog that I have been tired once before. And I seem to have repeated that. I am wondering when I will stop being tired and be energetic in the name of life. Not that I don't go exercising, I do. Not that I don't like socialising because I do. But just tired from it all.
I am an emotional person. A person where feelings mean a whole lot more than just well... feelings I guess. The way I see it, I invest in many things emotionally. Some may say that it is good because I take ownership of it, some may say it is dangerous because then I over indulge in it and hence my feelings / emotions get thwarted. I believe in God and Jesus Christ as my guide but my heart tells me and guides me far more than God. A lesson sometimes I think I should learn in which God should be the one to guide rather than me trying to be self-righteous and go on a hell-bender and hope to GOD that things will pan out. But that pretty much describes my life.
Anger is never one of my strong traits and when I do get angry it somehow is tied to a huge catalyst of some sort. And what when anger does come into play, boy oh boy does it get out of hand.
People know me as a calm person with very little anger spurts because I keep it under control. But maybe because I don't like confrontations that are anger based. But when I do get angry at anyone, then the silent treatment is given. But recently I have been more vocal. More in your face.
I don't know what to make of it. Is it because I can no longer keep quiet and that by voicing out my discontent, I'd be able to have some kind of dignity? Or by defending my position, it will at least help in telling people that I am not stupid and that my arguments have basis?
I am at a point in time where being tired is a common occurrence. Tired from what? Tired from being the little nice girl. Tired from being the one who minds her mouth because she doesn't want to piss off the person she is with. Tired from always having to think of what to say to make sure doesn't sound stupid. Or maybe just plain tired. Tired because I have not been able to absorb life to the fullest.
All this I can tell is quite challenging to me. I remember writing in a previous posting on another blog that I have been tired once before. And I seem to have repeated that. I am wondering when I will stop being tired and be energetic in the name of life. Not that I don't go exercising, I do. Not that I don't like socialising because I do. But just tired from it all.
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